You had a great first date. Now you are obsessed with that person and can’t wait to see them again. Slow down! Here’s why…
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You finally meet someone amazing, someone who seems like your perfect match. The attraction is off the charts. The discussion is ongoing. You leave the date with a kiss goodnight and a big smile on your face. You are obsessed, you can’t get this person out of your mind. You can’t wait to see them again. You may have met “the one” – or you may not. Obsessed after a great first date? You are not alone. And it’s important not to get carried away after that initial date. Here’s why…
Because obsessing after a great first date is unhealthy
Sometimes we obsess over a great first date because it’s been so long since we felt a connection. Often times, we get tired of dating and this person has a great personality and seems to tick all of our boxes. Whatever the reason, if you’re looking for love and you think you’ve found it, you’re excited. Why not?
Just because the date went well doesn’t mean they’ll call you back or that they’re a good match. Just because you had a great time doesn’t mean they did, even if they seemed to be vibrating with you. A great first date doesn’t mean much. You don’t know them well enough to decide they are “the one”. That’s why it’s important to slow down.
3 Signs You’re Obsessed
Watch for signs you may be obsessing so you can reclaim your power.
1. You keep checking your phone, waiting for them to text or ask you out again
You keep checking your phone to see if they called or texted. If they’re not in touch the next day, you want to text them, even though you texted after the first date to tell them how great the date was and you hope to do it again soon. This constant checking is crazy!
2. You stop dating other people
You’re so sure that this person is special, you stop responding to other people who are interested in you. But, you don’t know this person well enough to set up another date. This can sabotage your love life.
3. You make up stories about them
You make up stories and excuses about why they haven’t texted or called. Or you make up stories about what you did wrong on the date that made them reconsider whether they want to see you again. Maybe you’re not pretty/thin/witty/rich enough. Or you make up stories about their character and personality even though you just met. All these stories are just stories and not facts.
How to stop obsessing after a great first date
When you’ve already built a future before there’s even a present with that person, it can be hard to cool your jets. Here are three ways to stop obsessing and get back to reality.
1. Remember that you don’t really know them
It was just a date. You don’t know this person. It’s easy to appear charming, sweet, attentive and sexy on a date. Maintaining good character is another story. So remember, you barely know this person. You were so excited, you hoped it would be the right match, but they could also be very wrong about you.
2. Continue to date others
Don’t close your profile after a great date. Keep your options open until you actually meet someone. Go on more dates with others, as dating is all about discovery. It takes time to decide if someone is right for you. Explore, don’t decide on first dates.
3. Live your best life
Continue to live your life as you did before you made that great date. Going out with friends. Meet new people. Do things you love. You will be less obsessed with one person when your life is filled with activities and people you love.
Many of us obsess over a great date at some point in our lives. This is because we are optimistic and want to be in love. Be proud that you have the ability to open your heart, even if it’s just for a little while. And save all your heart for someone who shows you over time that they can be your person. Until then, have a good date!
If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and want to finally find love, sign up for a free 45 minute session with Sandy
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Get a copy of Sandy’s books, To become a woman of value. How to thrive in life and love and Pick Points on Appointments. Empowering women to make healthier decisions in love.
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