Be careful not to interview people on the first date – Dating relationship guidance and advice

In today’s weekly post, I want to discuss a topic that I think needs to be addressed: Be careful not to interview people on dates!

As much as dating can feel like a job interview sometimes, it should never feel clinical or intimidating! Some men and women have a huge checklist that can feel like an interrogation. It’s not a great experience to be put in that position and it feels like control.

When did some people get so justified as they think “An appointment“Should every box be labeled with unrealistic relationship expectations? One wrong answer and it’s out!

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have some insecurities or some flaws, so why are so many people so quick to write off someone they haven’t even given a chance? Just because he might not be ripped and 6.2 feet tall, or he might not be a hot curvy blonde, they shy away from exploring anything further. Is this a mature or reasonable reason to walk away?

I spoke with a group of women recently in downtown Vancouver, near where I live. They were from New York and told me how hard it is to date there. “All men want younger, model-type women, and there are very few quality types available.” I told them it’s the same line I hear in every city I visit and this isn’t just an isolated situation in New York. That’s the feeling everywhere!

When did things get so shallow? If you listen carefully to your gut, you’ll often have great dating experiences. There are some amazing people out there who are worth your time and energy, but you need to be open when going on a first date with an optimistic outlook.

Single men and women need a dating attitude adjustment.

There is a much needed reprogramming when it comes to all that negative thinking about dating and relationships! Not all men are the same and neither are all women. Some of these statements and assumptions are based on frustration, lack of instant gratification and also fear.

“When something doesn’t work the way we like it, we find a way to separate it so it doesn’t bother us as much. We shift the blame instead of taking the time to see that we have created a pattern of self-sabotage.” 💔

You deserve to have a loving partnership, so change your mindset and stop thinking that there is no one out there for you. When you have fewer expectations and fewer prejudgments about everyone you date, you’ll begin to see that most people have something to offer. That doesn’t mean they’re your forever person, but giving people a chance will definitely bring you closer to meeting a potential partner. Don’t close the door so quickly on a great relationship.

There are plenty of men and women who want to meet someone their own age who aren’t into drama or games. They are actually available and ready for a relationship. Thinking you’ll never meet anyone alienates your chances actually meeting someone because your body language and pessimistic thinking are pulling them in the opposite direction!

Photo by cottonbro studio

Dating can be fun and stress-free, but it won’t be if you tend to treat it like a quiz interview.

How often do you hear someone say they are picky when it comes to being in a relationship? No one is perfect, so start looking at people from a different perspective. You are perfect; Do you enjoy interviews? What’s on your checklist? Your list should have a few priorities and traits that are important as well as compliment who you are as your authentic self.

Here are some examples of a realistic checklist:

• Excellent communicator.
• Emotionally available and ready to be in a loving relationship.
• Respect for themselves and others.
• They are supportive and loyal.
• They have a full life but also prioritize their cooperation.
• There is a mutual attraction for each other.
• You both have a great sense of humor.
• You have similar boundaries and relationship goals.

People can change for the better, but they must first own past actions, be open to some change, and be ready to do so.

Tell the Universe that you are ready for a relationship and openly ask for what you want. Believe that you are worthy of having a loving partnership, then welcome it with open arms. I am not saying that things will change overnight because that is entirely up to you and how quickly you change your energy and attitude.

Old patterns can be slow to completely diminish when they have been embedded in your mind for so long, but you can teach an old dog new tricks than you might think. It’s really about believing that you deserve to be happy, just like anyone else. There’s no reason to have a high-maintenance perspective or unachievable checklist. Being stuck in this mindset is not only unhealthy for you, there is no one out there who can live up to these expectations.

It’s always a good idea to take a step back from dating when certain patterns arise that don’t serve you well. It’s also a great practice to seek help from a trusted friend, dating coach, or counselor so you can make some personal changes and move in a better direction.

If any of today’s articles resonated with you and you’re tired of this repetitive pattern you’ve created, it’s time to take charge, lighten up, and change what’s not working in your love life. You have to make changes to see changes. Owning your role in what is not happening is the first big step in finding a solution to what is missing. Sometimes you just have to get away from your own in the way for a while.

I love hearing from you and will always have time to reply. Leave your comments below!

Thanks, Sybersue xo ❤️

Sybersue Private Dating Coaching – Contact me at dearsybersue@gmail.com and message me there to set up a video call or voice call date within 24 hours. Thanks!