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“Then the Lord God said: It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper fit for him.’ … But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep, and while he slept he took one of his ribs and closed its place with flesh. And the rib which the Lord God took from the man, he made into a woman and brought it to the man. Then the man said, “This is at last bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. she will be called Woman, because she came out of Man.” [Portions of Gen 2:18-24 ESV]
I doubt God was surprised that Adam was alone and needed someone, and I don’t think God expected Adam to find what he needed among the animals. I think God did what He did, the way He did it so that Adam would realize how much he needed Eve. God made Adam long for a mate, made him really want it, so he would properly value Eve.
Imagine what it was like for Adam. Here was someone who was like him. not like the animals who could not communicate with him, nor like God, who was beyond his understanding. Here was someone with whom he could share his curiosity and wonder, someone who could appreciate the adventure of life. Here was someone Adam could help and protect, and someone who could love and care for him in return. She was similar but different, she had things that Adam did not have. it filled him, and made him more complete. What about sex? I don’t know if Adam had any drive or awareness of sexuality before Eve. But imagine the words of praise he must have had for God after experiencing the great joy and pleasure of becoming physically one with Eve!
So what about you – you forgot how much you wanted a woman? Do you remember the emptiness, the pain of being alone even when you were with people? Remember how much you wanted a woman you could call your own who would share life with you?
A few years before I got married, when I really wanted to get married, I went with a group of men from my church to an Ed Cole Christian Men’s Network meeting. The meeting was four hours away and we drove back after it was over on Saturday night. I was in a car with three married men, and as it was getting late, they started discussing how they were going home late and tired, and had to get up for church in the morning. and their wives would like to talk about the meeting. I heard them complain about it until I couldn’t hold back anymore. I blast them for not caring about their wives, for missing what Ed had said about how important it was to share their lives and experiences with their wives, and I’m done with how I wish I had a woman waiting for me at home. keeping me awake because he deeply wanted to share my life. We then drove in silence for quite some time. I wonder if any of these men went home and gave their wives a really big hug and a few words of appreciation.
I know your wife isn’t perfect. I know it has disappointed you. I know it doesn’t meet all your needs and that it frustrates you sometimes. Try to remember when you were single and why you longed to get married. Don’t focus on the parts that are imperfect. look at all the places that bless you. Then give your wife a really big hug and a few words of appreciation.
[This post first appeared Aug 05, 2012.]
A post worth reading:
Dr. Corey Carlisle | When self-help doesn’t help ◄ You have to know who you are to become your best self.
Image credit: © Paul H Byerly vis stockdreams.ai
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