My podcast guest, Kelli Miller, has simple solutions to common relationship issues. Tune in to learn more!
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Kelli Miller is a psychotherapist, best-selling author and radio host. He is the author of the book on couples’ relationships.Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” and the award-winning best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. She was a relationship presenter on Balance from Nature TV and is currently a relationship writer and presenter for wikihow.com. Kelli was a co-host on LA Talk Radio with over 1 million listeners, 250 celebrity and author guests and a seasoned radio personality for SIRIUS/XM Radio. She was Examiner.com’s “Women’s Relationship Expert” and was recently featured in Oprah Magazine in three relationship articles.
In this episode of Last First Date Radio:
- Why it’s harder now for couples to work together than it was a decade ago
- Why couples stop having sex and the top three tips for dealing with sex issues
- Tips for dealing with addiction, anger and past trauma entering relationships
- Because time outs aren’t just for kids
- What is the fast food communication method?
- The number one recommendation for rekindling your connection
EP 596: Kelli Miller – Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Common Relationship Issues
Why do you think it’s harder now for couples to work together than it was a decade ago?
There are so many more distractions. Even calling on a date makes people feel less addicted. Have a phone and computer free zone when you are on a date or in a relationship.
Why do couples stop having sex and what are your top three tips for dealing with sex issues?
- The main thing I’ve seen is dissatisfaction in our partnerships. This creates a wall. Contact your partner. If you feel emotionally safe, you will feel physically safe.
- Also, if it’s not that exciting anymore, make an effort to feel and look good. Do fun adrenaline-pumping activities like rock climbing to increase your sex drive.
- It can feel overwhelming. I recommend sensei therapy, focusing on sensation versus orgasm
What is your advice for dealing with addiction, anger and past trauma that comes into relationships?
“If it’s not a thing, it’s a mother” – we all have baggage. Know your triggers. “When it’s hysterical, it’s historic.” This is probably something from the past. Find out where it comes from. Be aware. Tell your partner you’re turned on and working on it.
Because time outs aren’t just for kids?
We all need a break, a refresher to be able to regulate and be more calm when we are hot. Time outs help us decompress. The person calling the timeout says when to recover.
What is your method of communication for fast food?
If you go through a drive-thru at a fast food restaurant, they will repeat it. I want couples to do the same thing. “What I’m hearing you say is…” He validates them and pauses and lowers defenses. Assume positive intentions from your partner. Be curious and not hypothetical.
What’s your number one tip for rekindling a relationship?
Being vulnerable is key. Say, “I feel like we’ve lost each other. How can we reconnect?’ “It would really mean a lot to me if you planned a date.” “I miss our connection.”
What are your final tips for anyone looking to go on their last first date?
Being open on dates is very important. Commit to surrendering to the process. It is tiring to date, but let the results. Bring silliness and joy. Worst case scenario is you learn something. The best case is to find love. Be patient and trust. It’s not IF you’ll find love but WHEN.
Watch this episode on YouTube
Connect with Kelli
Website www.kellimillertherapy.com
IG https://www.instagram.com/kellimillertherapy/
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