Today’s conversation is one I think we could all use some help with. How to handle relationship conflict in your partnership.
Anyone who watches my videos and reads my posts knows how important I think communication is in a partnership. If you have a communicative relationship as a couple, you will always be able to resolve conflicts quickly and maturely. We all argue and have some disagreements in our relationships, but understanding how to learn from them and overcome the problem is the key to having a great partnership.
#1 – The first thing that needs to happen is that you both need to own up to your mistakes and don’t blame your partner.
When you learn how to use the word “I” instead of “you” when trying to get your point across, you reduce the onus on your partner. When you make a statement saying:I feel sad when we argue and I would like to find a way that we can both compromise to fix this problem. I’m sorry for my part in this situation and I respect your opinion and hear what you have to say. I hope you will also understand my point of view.”
Applying this cultured way of handling a heated argument may sound easier said than done, but with a little practice and seeing how quickly this format defuses heated discussion, you’ll both learn how to adapt to using this method. when facing future conflicts.
Blaming your partner, without taking responsibility for your part in the problem, will only cause continued issues between you as a couple. It adds more fuel to the fire that is already burning! It gets pretty old, you always have to be right, and you end up with a one-sided argument that never gets fixed. This causes a built-up resentment that can be difficult to come back from.
#2 – The second thing to keep in mind is to listen to what your partner has to say, respect their opinion, and vice versa.
You are both entitled to an opinion. Listening to each other and really listening it shows each other that you respect them and value their opinion. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say, but acknowledging their point of view shows you’re open to hearing their concerns and ideas. Sometimes their take on things can be a better choice and can provide a different insight that you have never considered before. The same could be said for applying your personal feelings. We all want to feel validated by our partners.
It’s always important to remember that being in a committed partnership means working as a couple and finding healthy solutions together as a team.
Dear Sybersue
#3 – The third process when dealing with relationship conflict is to be able to apologize to each other and not hold onto an argument without resolving it.
If you don’t find a constructive way to deal with a disagreement in your partnership, you will continue to have recurring issues. Being able to apologize to each other goes a long way in maintaining healthy longevity in your relationship.
Being stubborn and blaming your partner is a big catalyst and reason why many breakups happen. There should always be some compromise in any disagreement, because you and your partner won’t always agree to agree on everything. This is what makes us unique as humans.
Having different opinions can also make you look at things in a more open-minded way and give you a different perspective every now and then. This is another reason why listening to what your partner has to say is so beneficial. Not only will they feel heard and validated, but you’ll also have a new perspective to think about. This is a win/win situation!
Ignoring your partner’s point of view and not listening or accepting what they have to say constantly causes the walls of the relationship to break down a little more with each unresolved scenario. This is why it is imperative that you are on the same page when it comes to most things at the beginning of your partnership.
Seeing each other’s eyes whenever possible, respecting each other’s feelings and understanding the need for small changes will always keep you closely connected as a couple. It’s okay to make mistakes and apologize when you make mistakes in your relationship. No one is perfect and we all find our way as we evolve in life. This is a part of growth that we all go through, and respecting our loved ones and owning our flaws is another big part of that learning curve.
Please watch the video below for more information on today’s discussion.
Sybersue xo <3
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